What would you do?

[dik]

11) For what ever GENUINE reason you remove a cambelt that has done 10,000
miles, do you:

a) Argue with the customer about not refitting the old belt
b) Just fit a new belt, worry about the customer moaning later
c) Don't even think about, just fit old belt

d) Leave the old belt on, hope it fails and then do a very expensive engine repair

[Meat-Head]

Hi guys. Today is 13th October - today is 'Tracy Barlows' wedding anniversery:-

Lady came in today. Looked VERY much like Tracy Barlow, very pretty.

French car 2 faults - surprise surpise. One of them no win jobs - you KNOW you can't fix the fault.

Smacked the 'Skid-steer pressure controller' with a hammer and the light went out. Out of 100 a week of these that was NEVER happened.

Normally a pretty woman just stands in the way and mentioned her boyfriend 20 times per second. This one didn't

Anyway she was intelligent - she said that the Skid-steer pressure controller warning light' would come on after a week.

Anyway no point charging her - not worth time writing out receipt
she said - that could she buy 'Team Meat' their lunch - what would you have said:-

1) No thanks, love
2) I'll just just my VIP DK user name on a bussiness card
3) Just sucky-sucky if you want.
4) We have a communial MacDonalds staff card* we use

Really hope she comes back - looked at her cd player, was hoping
it played Baby Bird Your Gorgeous - no such luck.


* REMEMBER STRICT RULES ON DK ABOUT CARD SHARING



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Bloke comes in you know he has driven at least 6 miles - modern fuel injected automatic car:

So you jump in it, see it's an Autospastic, flick the key, brains on brakes, select reverse thrust, brake off, engine stalls - you think that's odd
park, re-light the after burner, drive in workshop.

The job is a fault finding job - over heating

1) The bloke speaks to words of Inglish "too dear" - that's it
2) You can't be arsed to work out what is wrong - thermostat or fan switch - it is pressureising - no oil in water/water in oil - so you
assume head gasket and water pump ok. Nukeing temp sender with blow torch 10 seconds fan runs.

Do you tell the bloke

a) thermostart and tempswitch MUST be changed in pairs?
b) it needs a tempswitch and thermostat?
c) lie and say the thermoswitch is duff as it should work fan instanly
with blow torch?

Anyway whilst you are working on it - start and stopping the engine, you VERY quickley work out it's the ignition switch is ~~~~ed 21 goes - stops everytime you let go of key - you hold in over and after a while it seems to be ok.

Do you:

a) Mention it to customer
b) Say nothing?



Next day customer comes back - first thing he says 'since you' car cuts out

Do you

1) Loose your cool
2) Tell him it did that anyway


"fan no working, you bastard we try one hour yesterday" - but it's not over heating either you rev the engine for 30 seconds - fan cuts in

Do you:-

1) Hold at 2000 rpm
2) Hold at 4000 rpm?

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You walk out of the store room to go into the office as it's nearly 12 mins since you last logged on onto DK - BUT the last customer is in the doorway of the office on the floor having somekind of ashma or eplipic attack - you quickley realise this guy has been here for at least 10 mins
Time is pressing on - you MUST log onto DK - this blokes now starting to dribble - what do you do

THERE IS ONLY ONE ANSWER FOR THIS ONE NOTHING ELSE WILL
DO - YOU HAVE NO CHOICE - YOU *HAVE* TO STEP OVER THE GUY TO GET TO THE COMPUTER - NO OTHER OPTION.

(WHEN you log off - you find the bloke has gone.)

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You have only space for one car inside overnight, but three cars out side what do you put inside:-

1) Sierrrrra Saffeire worth $1.50 the bill is $150

2) Shitroen Shasho only worth what some body will pay for it customer has wasted THOUSANDS on it been feautred on www.barryboys.co.uk
50 times this week- warranty job - no charge

3) Honda Civic Type R worth $2000 the bill $15.00 CASH and 1oz of weed

Which do you put inside?


Thanks guys

[cqae]

damn the DK forum has consumed a few hours here!........how many hours a day do you spend on this forum meat?

[Meat-Head]

damn the DK forum has consumed a few hours here!........how many hours a day do you spend on this forum meat?

Too much normally 10 mins before work then 6pm-11pm at night, most nights

[cqae]

its pretty addictive I agree.......ive lost way too many hours sleep while reading "just one more thread"

[richy_rich]

1. Jack up rear end on trolley jack, _carefully-ish_ push/winch car indoors.
2. Blame supplied part
3. Ask DK!
3a. Cut supply to siren, wire up 12v christmas lights, drape attractively round car interior
4. Depends if it can reasonably be done before they leave. Lend them an alternative?
5. Agree with riddler's answer.
6. Odd one. I'd just tell them what had happened and charge them for the time, all factual like.
7. Yeah, get your money back, or say that due to demand there's a ?75 sign up fee for new businesses now (admin charges etc. etc. *waves hands about*...
8. Blame the 'saturday boy'.
9 + 10. Ugh, phone local upholsterer and beg for invisible mending services like in that old Yellow Pages advert..

[gtmech]

Meat head my friend, your thread is a perfect description of what i have to put up with at work in a week aswell. Here's a quick preview of what we experience in a week.

1. The customer will moan about everything, so when you wake up in the morning remember to look forward to going to work for another day of it.
2. The customer wont pay the cost for a scan when its only a 5 minute job, the fact the software costs you thousands a year means nothing to them.
3. Of course the radio only stopped working since we did the rear brakes, its your fault and never the customers, the cars these days have the radio wired up to the rear brake calipers through a fuse somewhere which cant be found.
4. No you cant have the TAX off the bill.
5. No its not cheaper if you pay in cash but still want a receipt.
6. Yes its not a big job but no you cant wait for the car as believe it or not your car is not the only car we have to fix today.
7. Will my car that I booked in for brakes, service, and a million other jobs be ready by the end of the day? NO IT WONT. But I need it? The exercise will do you good.
8. Sorry I brang back your car that you loaned we while you were fixing my car but i have had a little accident with it. You walk outside, yup, its a complete write off. How much will it cost to fix it. But I cant afford that? Oh well it looks like im f***ed then doesnt it.
9. Hi im just ringing to see if my BMW is ready? Ok which one is that your asking about? Its the Red one. You look outside and there are 5 Red BMW's booked in today so you ask what model is your BMW, of course they dont know that, its just s red BMW.
10. Customer comes to pick up car, Oh I didnt expect it to be $1000 for my Mercedes air suspension failure. Well thats what you were quoted on the phone before the work was done as you asked us to do. Oh sorry its been a tiring day, is it ok if I pay it off. What can I say? Ok you say, leave me what you have and we will setup weekly payments. The customer leaves you $100 for a $1000 bill.

Ah good work starts again in 8 eight hours, I can hardly wait!

[Furax]

BUMP!


I have a new one.

Fitted a second hand starter to a friend of a friends car. Even went to the effort of sourcing the startermotor off ebay. Total cost of the job was ?60 with ?25 for the starter motor.

New starter motor works fine, but since disconnecting the battery the keyfob wont work anymore. It will not resync so needs some kind of main dealer intervention to get it hooked up and running again. To make matters worse the drivers lock is bust so its a pain to lock and unlock the car.

Owner seems to be taking the stance of "It was working when you collected it"

Should I

A) Tell him there is nothing i can do, sorry
B) Fix it, probably leaving me in negative cash for the job.
C) Give him the labour back for the job and send him on his way
D) Try call in a favour to get it sorted FOC (these favors are not easy to come by)

Answers on a postcard, or just a post... whatevers easiest.

[Liteace]

Tell him you can fix it but you want money up front just incase he ~~~~~s off after you sorted it. Dont give him any money back. If its a french car tell him to ~~~~~ off

[Meat-Head]

A) Tell him there is nothing i can do, sorry
B) Fix it, probably leaving me in negative cash for the job.
C) Give him the labour back for the job and send him on his way
D) Try call in a favour to get it sorted FOC (these favors are not easy to come by)

Answers on a postcard, or just a post... whatevers easiest.

1) Meant to bump your thread about this - as the car starts then it's programmed to that car - *THINK* you can resync key any time of
day or night

2) The starter was faulty, that's why you changed it. Who ever changed it would have HAD to disconnect the battery

OFF TOPIC:-

Some bloke from the UK travling around Spain got through France
and Germany to Spain, where he found some guy to repair the
starter, who ~~~~ed it off to a DFM (Dumb ~~~~ Mecahnic).

The stareter was removed, but DFM left battery on.
FIZZ, SPARK, CRACK 20 mins, it's off

Repaired, FIZZ, CRACKLE, WELD, ZAPP it's back on, but car won't
start - crank 2 seconds no run, no love you long time.

Now tried to push start it - been push started EVERYWHERE last 500 miles - nil poi - no start - starter shorted out, crank long time nil poi

(No idea the out come)

ON TOPIC:-

If he had took it to the dealer it would have came out with

1) New starter $155+VAT
2) PASS code $25+VAT
3) TWO NEW keys @ $70+VAT EACH
4) NEW DOOR barrel (OR WHOLE LOCKSET $350+VAT)
5) NEW earth strap
6) "Blankety Blank chequebook and pen"

Just tell he to download off Ebay a YANG-FOO remote locking kit, you will fit for double normal price DO NOT MENTION "Goodwill Jesture" DO NOT SAY "SORRY MATE" - your 'admitting' your fault.

It was going to happen and that was it.

OR

You could argue that the French (Reno Scenic) will only lock and unlock 10,000 times then NIL-POI. You could argue that as you nor him can prove it - how many times the remote has been pressed!.

Oh try on ACC first. Also (OFF TOPIC check the heater motor wiring
fed form ign switch, just incase been bodge and car can't 'see' ignition turned on.

[del635]

16 16v laguna in for timing belt and service, nice handy earner, the 'mechanic' hits it off the limiter pulling into garage after listening to the owner tell how its advertised for sale (the owner thinks his 600 quid laguna is worth 2600 btw) and guess what happens next?? T/belt gone! To help the situation on a little there is a lower mileage engine sitting there from a damaged laguna!
A) Phone customer instantly and let him know he needs valves? Remember its in for belt, what you think if you were customer and what would his pub 'advisers' think, theres no woodruff key in the bottom pully
B) Say nothing fit your new engine and take loss
C) Lie through your teeth (cant even think of a good lie)
^^True story, what would yous guys do and I'll tell waht happened!!!!!

[Meat-Head]

A) Phone customer instantly and let him know he needs valves? Remember its in for belt, what you think if you were customer and what would his pub 'advisers' think, theres no woodruff key in the bottom pully
B) Say nothing fit your new engine and take loss
C) Lie through your teeth (cant even think of a good lie)
^^True story, what would yous guys do and I'll tell waht happened!!!!!

D) Strip the car 'as planned'
Get a piece of angle iron, put in vise twack with hammer
Get a M8 bolt, weld a washer too it, magle in vise
Spent two hours on DK, then another 1 hour looking at ~~~~

Call customer "'Ello Mr XXX it's M-H-M, just to let you know we are having a few problems with your shit French car, it may be a little longer than we expected. We have to remove the sideward facing foo-foo valve, to get to the timing belt, but it is held on by 3 bolts, 2 seized. that are hard to get at, but the good news is the easy one was missing"

Spend another 2 hours on DK another 1 hour looking at ~~~~.

Call customer "YOUR BAS**ARD CAR HAS JUST BIT MY HAND - GOING TO BE A LITTLE LONGER, YOU COONT"

After lunch call customer

"YOUR ~~~~ING, PILE OF FRENCH SHITE HAS JUST MANGED OUR ONE AND ONLY FLYWHEEL LOCKING TOOL - COST US $2.99 OFF EBAY 4 YEARS AGO. FIRST TIME WE HAVE USED IT, AND IT SHATTERED AS WE UNDID THE CRANCK PULLY WITH A SCOFFOLD BAR, WHICH IN TURN HAS MULLERED YOUR VALVES - WHAT THE ~~~~ DO YOU WANT US TO DO?"

Customer "arrh, err, umm ah"
Us "JUST GIVE US 10 MINS, WE NEED TO PM A FRIEND OF A FRIEND OF ANOTHER FORUM, WHO MIGHT HAVE AN ENGINE"

Tem mins later: "Hello Mr XXX, we have located another engine for you, it's going to be $XXX. Do you want it fitting"

[del635]

Ha ha why didnt I think of that!
We fitted the new engine which was got practically free anyways, told customer renault didnt have the wee caps for the cams until 3 days later and then told him coilpacks and a few other things were gone like the alternator clutch etc (basically all the stuff which looked newer on the spare engine!!) to make up the labour! Win! only the ****er left in a heap and got crackin car back with far lower mileage engine, when he came back to settle the bill he told us how well it was running compared to before and how he'd recomend us in the future. We just looked at each other and d when he left. There was no 'ing when it happened though......

[Meat-Head]

Ha ha why didnt I think of that!
.

So, sake of argument, if this happened next week, would would you do now you seen what M-H-M would do?
(serious question).

Also what would you do if the Label said hot and the powder said not?

[Meat-Head]

SO YOU BUY IN 'GOOD FAITH' a piece of automotive tool from a popular interet based site and to your horror thorough your friends at DK you feel the device is an 'illegal' China copy.

So you e-mail the company and they say it is a copy - go away there is no way to make it genuine

Yet playing around with EEPROMS etc you fin it CAN be made to work without inserting coin.

Do you

a) Email back saying i'll be more careful in future
OR

b) E-mail across the files uploaded on here and say - Thanks to 'My friends' heres the fix for them - not mentioing user names or the fact you are a VIP, Veteren, leecher etc of DK?

THANKS GUYS.