Butter the four slices of bread. Uncork the champagne (please note: should the champagne have a cap then use the workmans glove to help prevent welts while trying to unscrew cap) Alternatively , you can use a certain tonic wine in which case you`ll need the glove.Pour the (corked) champagne into the glasses and think of some occasion to celebrate chanting `For he`s a jolly good etc, or substituting `She` where appropiate. When you`re finished,as agood will gesture, throw the 4 slices of bread out for the birds. HEALTH AND SAFETY NOTE; Remember to put all glasses,cutlery etc. into the sink or dishwasher to be forgotten about. ENJOY.