Is this wrong?

[aleister crowley]

A few hours ago I had the Jehovah Witnesses at the door, a pair of middle aged woman brimming with holiness and anti blood transfusions.
Upon opening the door they swung straight into action, beaming massive smiles they asked "Why is there sooooooo much evil in the world?"

"I'm Jewish" I replied giving them a big grin.

Being confronted with a self confessed Christ killer stopped them in their tracks. Through gritted teeth one of them told me how nice it was to meet some one of faith before about turning and marching up the garden path.
Normally you have to beat them with a stick to get their foot from you door as they try and convert you by showing you that only their god can save you from the fiery depths of hell.

I'm not Jewish by the way but if it keeps these soul sucking bible bashers away from my house then call me Gideon and cut off my foreskin. lol

How do other people on here get rid of them?

[happy_highlander]

Big german shepherd held by the collar while standing on her back legs shouting. They back away pretty quick

[urbanracer]

When they ask if I want to be a Jevhovah's witness,i alway say I did'nt know he had been involved in an accident!

[aleister crowley]

One of them asked me about 10yrs ago if I'd ever read the Bible and I said "No,but I'm halfway through the Beano"

they didn't last long either.

Each to their own and if that's there own then fair enough, but don't knock on my fcking door trying to ram a faith down my throat.

If they want to believe there is an imaginary man in the sky who can talk to them then that is their business.
It's remarkable that believing in this so called God can cost you a sh*t load of money but still let your kids die if they need a transfusion.

[ChelseaBun]

i don't get why its legal for them to harass you at your own door trying to get you to join their shitty cult.

some old man and woman did it to me last year when i was at home by myself with the baby, i answered the door and he put his foot in ready to come in, what the hell gives them the right to think this is allowed? creepy ~~~~s, thankfully it hasn't happened since we moved, i mustve been targeted cause we we're in a bad area, you shouldve seen the look of disgust when they saw no wedding ring and heard the baby cry and jumped right into action as though i needed to be saved. lol

[gmb45]

i just go to the door bolok nakeeeed :puke:, enuff to scare any ~~~~er off even the bailiffs lol imagine it 9 inch of slack hanging doon combined with me moobs :puke:

[lagerland]

I tell them im an atheist or just no thanks i gave at the office...............

[Shady]

i question them about the morality of a religion that will allow a child to die instead of letting it have a blood transfusion, I question them about how come you never get catholics or C of E bothering them at their door..
I question them about how if they believe in the bible, then obviously, they think incest is ok...

TBH i prefer the mormons, theyre bat shit crazy so more deserving of a pishtake... look up some of the shit THEY believe in.. God lives on a planet called Kolob or summat :hmmmm:

[Shady]

i just go to the door bolok nakeeeed :puke:, enuff to scare any ~~~~er off even the bailiffs lol imagine it 9 inch of slack hanging doon combined with me moobs :puke:

:eek: 9 inch, i would have to put mine in 3x to get 9 inch :(

[Mjolinor]

What is amazing is that the same ones keep coming back. I have tried allsorts but they still come back unless you ring them at their "church" and tell them to stop.

Recommended removal method

Me "are you Jehovas"
them "Yes"
me "you have my sympathy now **** off"

That works quite well.

[maca]

Throw petrol at them followed by a match :)

[dik]

:eek: 9 inch, i would have to put mine in 3x to get 9 inch :( He meant 9" of slack beer belly hanging down!

[gopher7]

Throw petrol at them followed by a match :)

Seen how much petrol costs nowadays.?? That would be a waste of money.

[wongers]

i tell them my mam's not in seeing as i'm 55 they give a wierd look by then i've shut the door and back in front of the t.v. job done

[johnboy1974]

I tell them im an atheist and have no interest whatsoever in their god, then wish them good day and shut the door in their face.

[maca]

Or shoot them. or throw rotten food at them. or jump on them while holding a dirt devil product. or just stand there screaming. or rape them. or report them as pedophiles. or just kick them hard in the shins. or wipe shit on your face then kiss them "no tongues" . or put stickers on there backs saying kick me. or throw burnt pizza at them.

[aleister crowley]

i just go to the door bolok nakeeeed :puke:, enuff to scare any ~~~~er off even the bailiffs lol imagine it 9 inch of slack hanging doon combined with me moobs :puke:

lol

You could also try opening the door bollock naked holding a dildo.
Before they have chance to say anything ask them if they were the 'company' you ordered and how perfect it was they had sent two.

Then invite them in.

[patkins]

On the rare occasion that I am caught by them at the door, when they ask if I would like to become a Jehovas Witness I usually reply "But wouldn't that be perjury".

[Liteace]

Throw petrol at them followed by a match :)


Or shoot them. or throw rotten food at them. or jump on them while holding a dirt devil product. or just stand there screaming. or rape them. or report them as pedophiles. or just kick them hard in the shins. or wipe shit on your face then kiss them "no tongues" . or put stickers on there backs saying kick me. or throw burnt pizza at them.



So you dont like them then :hmmmm: ??

[maca]

So you dont like them then :hmmmm: ??
What makes you think that ???

[jordigirl]

my sis in law invited then in and joined them lol, after about 2 years of there shite, in then having to join the door knocking brigade she came to her sense's in left them,

when they knock on my door, i just tell them, i'm not interested, politely and shut door :) job done

[maca]

No you dont you take em in and bum them...

[jordigirl]

whatever floats ya boat maca :roflmao:

[Shady]

my sis in law invited then in and joined them lol, after about 2 years of there shite, in then having to join the door knocking brigade she came to her sense's in left them,

when they knock on my door, i just tell them, 'why aye, am not interest'd like man howay'


fixed it for you :)

[maca]

whatever floats ya boat maca :roflmao:
It still ~~~~in hurts now ya man ;)

[jordigirl]

it didnt need fixing shady :(

[V l a d i m i r]

How do other people on here get rid of them?
I can fart anytime. Perfect occasion.

[Cod3waX]

i laught at them n shut the door

[janobi]

Well I take two differing approaches, depending on how I feel.

1. I tell them I am an agnostic, and then explain to them exactly what that involves.

2. I ask them when was Jesus born, why are there no dinosaurs in the bible? Why have we denounced all other religions and gods (Mayans/Aztecs/Eygptians) yet this one must be real. I also ask them to explain the widely believed details about the immaculate inception (Pagan symbolism) and a few other facts.

Modern day religion is the biggest crock of poo ever!! All the widely held falacies can be traced back to Pagan religions. Birth of jesus on 25.12. Immaculate conception, face of god.

I can continue, but dont want to offend the god botherers here.

[Meat-Head]

ON TOPIC:-

Why do they not use blood transfusions?
Bit like saying, your car needs a NEW part, not a second hand part.

ON TOPIC:-

A lot of modern car parts are "OTP - one time programmable" - thorow it away, can't be reused, wounded if the knob that invented them was a jevohvo?

[Johnner]

Sorry to divert away from the thread,but I've ~~~~ing copped now why nobody understands Meaty's posts.He's sending these posts via his mobile,and has bloody predictive text on!!!

Wounded why it was like that !:confused:

[Meat-Head]

Sorry to divert away from the thread,but I've ~~~~ing copped now why nobody understands Meaty's posts.He's sending these posts via his mobile,and has bloody predictive text on!!!

Wounded why it was like that !:confused:


my last post in this thread was on pc
but firefox was auto done spellcheck on

nnow in bed on mobile

meat

[aleister crowley]

nnow in bed on mobile

nnow??? You weren't on the vinegar stroke there meat were you?

Hope you don't know how to work the camera as DK really wouldn't want a pic of your foo foo valve! :D

[Johnner]

Slight correction needed here: Thwacking his side facing foo-foo valves !

Giddy up Meaty :ridinghorse:

[Meat-Head]

, you shouldve seen the look of disgust when they saw no wedding ring and heard the baby cry lol

NO OFFENSE INTENDED
So, what if you was in the kitchen driving a sink full of posts at the time they called.

The last thing you want is washing them wine glasses and cutting them in half with your diamond ring.

NO OFFENSE INTENDED

[richy_rich]

I had some round a while back trying to persuade me that evolution was only a 'theory'.

Sounded fun, so I joined in and asked them to explain their understanding of the word theory and how the scientific process works, we talked a bit about axioms and logic and proof in general..

Then the quieter of the two, who obviously hadn't been listening properly came out with, 'if we evolved from monkeys how come there are still monkeys?' which stunned me for a second but we moved on to common ancestry for a while and how all that works.

And then we got on to their pamphlet and some of the errors it contained and how they could correct it to make it a more realistic and useful resource.. they were getting quite visibly wound up as we went on (shaking, raising their voices, blurting out random assertions) and eventually they just sort of left in a huff.

Probably took about an hour all in but they never, ever came back... :D

[headyshoty]

I say alway when they come:" Go to my uncel maybe he likes you!"

[Johnner]

Who would your uncle be ?




Sent from my HTC,with Crapatalky !

[Lainie]

i got to be honest and say im just rude to them. say im not interested. if its phone calls i just prattle on about telephone preference service and demand to know where they got my number from

[tshirtman]

I invite them in,
got quite a collection in the cellar now.

[Snowy79]

I ask them if they believe in ET. They then think I'm a nutter and leg it pronto.

[Meat-Head]

BUMMMMMMMMMMP:-

SO eariler on jumped into the Time Machine to go xmas shopping, ended up in some shit town, full of Polish, Lithains and Swedish and French people.

On the walk upto Poundland.com there was some bloke shouting

"Jesus lived in a crib, Jesus blah blah" - nearly tripped over his blackboard thing, though, right if he is still there on the way back, he's going to be asked a question:-

"Was Jesus a Digital-Kaos member?" - sadly by the time got back he had buggerd off.

However there was a monkey, sorry monk in the way on the route back to the time machine.

So he starts blabbering on about some book or something and menstration about how to relax gather thoughts, would it have been to start preeching back about Digital-Kaos - the worlds best website???

Thanksssssssss