I took a painting I found in my loft to the Antiques Roadshow. The expert inspected it and said...
"You have heard of Vincent Van Gogh, haven't you?"
"Yes I have," I said excitedly.
"He wouldn't have wiped his ar$e with this cheap sh*te."
-----------------------------------------------------
My wife burst into the bedroom wearing a naughty nurse's outfit last night.
"Do you need medical attention?" She winked.
"Yes! Yes I do," I replied. "I've got erectile dysfunction."
"Ooh," she giggled. "And when did this start?"
"About 30 seconds ago," I replied.
"You have heard of Vincent Van Gogh, haven't you?"
"Yes I have," I said excitedly.
"He wouldn't have wiped his ar$e with this cheap sh*te."
-----------------------------------------------------
My wife burst into the bedroom wearing a naughty nurse's outfit last night.
"Do you need medical attention?" She winked.
"Yes! Yes I do," I replied. "I've got erectile dysfunction."
"Ooh," she giggled. "And when did this start?"
"About 30 seconds ago," I replied.
