A Few Short Ones
What men do after sex?
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Why is your penis better than a credit card?
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LITTLE GIRL.......Mommy, I just found out that our neighbour's son has a penis like a peanut!!
MoM.........You mean it's small?
LITTLE GIRL....No it's salty!!!
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A couple recently married was happy with the whole thing.
He was happy with the hole, and she was happy with the thing.
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A man was carrying 3 babies in a train.
The lady sitting next to him asked: Are they your babies?
MAN: No, I work in a condom factory and these are customer COMPLAINTS..
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Women top 5 lies.
From The Whitest Down
5. I am a virgin.
4. It is so big.
3. I can't do that to my best friend.
2. I won't gain weight after marriage.
1. I am coming! I am coming!!!
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A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says: You want to play magic.
She says: What is that?
He says: We go Home, screw, and then you disappear.
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What is the closest thing to a woman's period?
Your SALARY... It comes once a month, lasts 4 or 5 days, and if it doesn't come, you are FU(KED!!!
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Teacher Asked.........
Which part of the body goes to heaven first?
A Kid replied : The legs...because every night I see my mom's legs up high and screaming 'OH GOD! I'M COMING'.
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Teacher: Why did you bring your cat to school?
Pupil : Because I heard my sister's boyfriend say, "TONIGHT I WILL EAT YOUR P*SSY".
- 2% eat
- 3% smoke cigarettes
- 4% take a shower
- 5% go to sleep &
- 86% get up and go back home to their wives.
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Why is your penis better than a credit card?
- Once spent it recharges itself.
- It is accepted worldwide.
- You can let your wife use it as much as she wants.
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LITTLE GIRL.......Mommy, I just found out that our neighbour's son has a penis like a peanut!!
MoM.........You mean it's small?
LITTLE GIRL....No it's salty!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A couple recently married was happy with the whole thing.
He was happy with the hole, and she was happy with the thing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A man was carrying 3 babies in a train.
The lady sitting next to him asked: Are they your babies?
MAN: No, I work in a condom factory and these are customer COMPLAINTS..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Women top 5 lies.
From The Whitest Down
5. I am a virgin.
4. It is so big.
3. I can't do that to my best friend.
2. I won't gain weight after marriage.
1. I am coming! I am coming!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says: You want to play magic.
She says: What is that?
He says: We go Home, screw, and then you disappear.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What is the closest thing to a woman's period?
Your SALARY... It comes once a month, lasts 4 or 5 days, and if it doesn't come, you are FU(KED!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Teacher Asked.........
Which part of the body goes to heaven first?
A Kid replied : The legs...because every night I see my mom's legs up high and screaming 'OH GOD! I'M COMING'.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Teacher: Why did you bring your cat to school?
Pupil : Because I heard my sister's boyfriend say, "TONIGHT I WILL EAT YOUR P*SSY".
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