Most Offensive World Records

[Cronus]

The Most Offensive World Records


MOST SEMEN SWALLOWED
Michelle Monahan had 1.7 pints of semen pumped out of her stomach in Los Angeles in July 1991.

LONGEST PUBES
Maoni Vi of Cape Town has hair measuring 32 inches from the armpits and 28 inches from her vagina.

MOST CAVERNOUS CROTCH
Linda Manning of Los Angeles could, without preparation, completely insert a lubricated American football into her vagina.

ZITS
In July 1987, Carl Chadwick of Rugby, England, squeezed a zit and projected a detectable amount of yellow pus a distance of 7ft 1inch.

WORST DRINK
The most horrible drink to be considered a beverage and safely drunk is Khoona. It is drunk by Afghani tribesmen on their wedding night and consists of a small amount of still-warm very recently attained bull semen. It is believed to be a potent aphrodisiac.

MOST OFFENSIVE COCKTAIL
This is available from a few select bars in New York. It contains tomato juice, a double shot of vodka, a spoonful of French mustard and a dash of lime. It is not mixed, but served with a tampon (unused) instead of a cocktail umbrella and is known as a 'C*nt Pump'.

GREATEST DISTANCE ATTAINED FOR A JET OF SEMEN
Horst Schultz achieved 18 ft 9 in with a 'substantial' amount of seminal fluid. He also hold the records for the greatest height (12 ft 4in) and the greatest speed of ejaculation, or muzzle velocity, with 42.7mph.

LONGEST TURD
The longest dump ever verified was produced by an American who, produced a 'staggering turd' over a period of 2 hr 12 mins which was officially measured at 12 ft 2in. The offender is banned from 134 washrooms in his state.

MOST PROLONGED FART
Bernard Clemmens of London managed to sustain a fart for an officially recorded time of 2 mins 42 seconds

[DNG2010]

I think the most interesting one out of everything is the last one.

MOST PROLONGED FART
Bernard Clemmens of London managed to sustain a fart for an officially recorded time of 2 mins 42 seconds

Damm 2:42 for a fart.... thats just crazy.

[ruudvandan]

how the hell can anyone produce a 12ft turd?

[Itsme]

how the hell can anyone produce a 12ft turd?

probably had an icing nozzle up his a*se

[Cronus]

how the hell can anyone produce a 12ft turd?

With exquisite precision I'd say. Thats an art form that is...imagine having to squeeze your sphincter just hard enough to push it out but not snap it off. If its true then the guy deserves a medal.

Bet there was blood on the end of it though...

[racin-snake]

bet his tonsils were on the other end

[beatstreet]

how the hell can anyone produce a 12ft turd?

Sooo satisfying a bet it was.

On the subject of World Records that i wouldnt want to win
Watch Smallest Dick Contest Video | Break.com

[phuser]

It's good to know the world is paying attention.

My lord.

[zaphodbb]

[QUOTE=Cronus;733478] The Most Offensive World Records




LONGEST PUBES
Maoni Vi of Cape Town has hair measuring 32 inches from the armpits and 28 inches from her vagina.




bet she walked like john wayne when she had her curlers in

[larryoke]

[QUOTE=Cronus;733478] The Most Offensive World Records


LONGEST TURD
The longest dump ever verified was produced by an American who, produced a 'staggering turd' over a period of 2 hr 12 mins which was officially measured at 12 ft 2in. The offender is banned from 134 washrooms in his state.

I wonder who they would get to verify this & how do you think it was achieved ie: did he squat and sort of walk forward leaving it 12 ft behind him or did he have someone guiding it out & laying it down for the man from guinness book of records to measure it, & while it's in my mind (urgh) how did he know when he went for a shit that this was gonna be the 1 to break all records?