Old lady first time

[vuno01]

An old lady goes to a sex shop for the first time
and she asks the girl there
- hello can you tell what are those up there?
the girl in the shop says
- those are vibrators or dildos
and we have them in all sizes colors and shapes
if you just choose i will get for you
the old lady says
- ok i would like that red one on the wall there
the girl says
- sorry mam thats our fire extinguisher

[vuno01]

a friend to another
- hey man do you know the diference betwen
a blond and an harley davidson?
the other one goes
-hell yeah, not everybody has the previlege
to ride an harley.

[vuno01]

whats the fastest thing on earth????

[vuno01]

diarreia
most times you cant even see it comming.

[thewizardofodds]

An old lady goes to a sex shop for the first time
and she asks the girl there
- hello can you tell what are those up there?
the girl in the shop says
- those are vibrators or dildos
and we have them in all sizes colors and shapes
if you just choose i will get for you
the old lady says
- ok i would like that red one on the wall there
the girl says
- sorry mam thats our fire extinguisher

The version i heard a hundred years ago was a tartan one and it was bloke flask

[gopher7]

whats the fastest thing on earth????

Milk
.
.
.
.
Because it's pasteurized before you see it.

[frundlemud]

2 ladies walking home from pub ..one says I could do with a piss. So they jumped over the cemetry wall. One says what shall we do to wipe our bits. Well I'm going to use my pants says the one. I will use this wreath says the other.
Next day their fellas were talking,,my missus came home last night with no drawers on. Thats nothing says his mate ..mine came home with a card wedged up her arse saying "we will miss you from all at the fire station"