My Dog Named Sex

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  • leotheloin
    DK Veteran
    • Jul 2009
    • 1001

    #1

    My Dog Named Sex

    Everybody who has a dog calls him Rover or Lassie. I called mine Sex. Now Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex. He said "I would like to have one too" then I said "but this is a dog" He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said "but you don't understand I have had Sex since I was 9 years old. He replied that I must have been quite a kid.

    When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk I wanted a room for me and my wife and a separate room for Sex. He said every room in this place is for sex. I said "you don't understand. Sex keeps me awake all night" and the clerk replied "me too".

    I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I could have sold tickets for that "but you don't understand, I hope to have Sex on T.V." He called me a Show off.

    When my wife and I separated we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said "Your honor I had sex before we were married". The judge said "me too". Then I told him that after we were married sex left me. He replied "me too".

    Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around for him. A cop came over and asked me "What are you doing wandering around the alley at 4 am for?" I replied "I am looking for Sex" My case comes up in court on Friday.
  • Shady
    Shite Link King
    • Dec 2010
    • 6404

    #2
    forced my eyes to focus on that shitty black text for nothing
    Fave replies from various threads

    1: What the fff is all that about??? All that crap below your reply I mean, get a life mate
    2: no info on google abt the pace sv5 rang asda they have no idea what i was talking about,
    3: Your total contribution to this forum, bordering on trolling, seems to have been a collection of snipes, one liners & asterisked expletives





    Comment

    • gc1966
      DK Veteran
      • Mar 2011
      • 2434

      #3
      i thought it was in braille then realised i had sneezed onto the screen

      Comment

      • garry1312
        DK Veteran
        • Oct 2010
        • 2178

        #4
        that was crap sorry mate but it was bad..... in future also write in a font colour that we will be able to read.

        Tip for others: highlight the text


        Rest In Peace Michael Mcharg, A true friend and although gone never forgotten. 11-10-08.

        Comment

        • Shady
          Shite Link King
          • Dec 2010
          • 6404

          #5
          Originally posted by garry1312
          Tip for others: highlight the text

          tip for others... DONT highlight the text, if you do, you'll be able to read it
          Fave replies from various threads

          1: What the fff is all that about??? All that crap below your reply I mean, get a life mate
          2: no info on google abt the pace sv5 rang asda they have no idea what i was talking about,
          3: Your total contribution to this forum, bordering on trolling, seems to have been a collection of snipes, one liners & asterisked expletives





          Comment

          • garry1312
            DK Veteran
            • Oct 2010
            • 2178

            #6
            true well for other threads.... not so much this one unless you really need to know what sex the dog is up to and his wild antics.

            Tip to others: you really do not need to know what sex the dog is up to.


            Rest In Peace Michael Mcharg, A true friend and although gone never forgotten. 11-10-08.

            Comment

            • astracoupe81
              Newbie
              • Feb 2012
              • 1

              #7
              hehe, funny

              Comment

              • garry1312
                DK Veteran
                • Oct 2010
                • 2178

                #8
                nice to see someone enjoyed it


                Rest In Peace Michael Mcharg, A true friend and although gone never forgotten. 11-10-08.

                Comment

                • gc1966
                  DK Veteran
                  • Mar 2011
                  • 2434

                  #9
                  highlight the text (slaps hand to forehead)

                  why did i not think of that

                  Comment

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