50 Shades of chav

[maca]

50 Shades of Chav. As I stood in line at the Job Centre thinking of lies why I couldn't work, a sweet smell drifted past my pig like nostrils. It was a mixture of weed and Lynx Africa. I turned around, and here was Billy. Even though his front teeth were missing, his sexy smile caught me like a heroin needle. Our eyes met, and before I knew what was happening, he had lifted me onto some wheelie bins in an alley way behind Iceland. He tied staffy up to block the alley way so we wouldn't be disturbed. He reached under my grey track suit bottom and fingered me through my Primark knickers. He kissed me really hard, smearing my bright pink Super drug lipstick all over our faces. I couldn?t believe I was back in his arms again, he stank of Cider and B.O, which turned me on so much more. I could feel a semi in his track suit bottoms which was really rare, because normally the crack played havoc with his erections.

[darrenhyland]

So effin funny i split my sides open................right lads lets keep this going and every one who replies must add to the story.

[Meat-Head]

right lads lets keep this going and every one who replies must add to the story.

Just as they finished the Jermy Kyle film crew turned up with the
dna results

[darrenhyland]

and it was definite................ Cameron was the father ............. he remembered that day so well ............ while trying to get some 'culturing' on a tour of Westminister a terrible thirst for Irn Bru came upon him ............ he set off for the nearest 7-11 leaving Vicky behind.

[Meat-Head]

Vicky then spend the last of her dole money on cider
then had no bus fair.

upon finding a "pool" cycle she rode home

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Jy6-Z7XRXlk

[darrenhyland]

but on the way she was rear ended by.................

[Meat-Head]

but on the way she was rear ended by.................

Angry mob trying to linch her for what she Tweeted to jermrmy kyle

[gc1966]

about the driver of the vehicle who happened to resemble a well known member of a internet forum who regularly gets banned for being certifiably insane and stupid. he picked her up and gently brushed the dirt from her bri-nylon dayglo shellsuit whilst quietly copping a feel,he smiled at her as she stumbled into him concussed and as her arm fell against his thigh she could feel the rock hard length of ten inches imprisoned within his dirty overalls.

her eyes widened as she stroked the length of his shaft which caused him to step back and reach inside his boilersuit flies to release his tool from its clothed prison with a lascivious grin,with bated breadth she dropped to her knees and wrapped four grime encrusted fingers around his tools girth whilst surveying its shiny head and making appreciative groans.in a certain light she reminded him of an amalgum of females he admired from afar and occasionly stalked.she had the eyes and nose of a soap actress he lusted after and the sensuous lips of a spare parts salesgirl that had caught his attention.at that moment he made the decision that he had to have her no matter what the cost,after all his significant wealth had been amassed due to overcharging gullible people for unnecessary repairs at his motor repair shop.


he lifted her up in a blur and roughly pushed her against the reae bumper while activating the boot release on his key-fob,the electronic beep distracted her enough for him to prise her fingers from his tool and bundle her into the darkened void before slamming the lid closed.he never was failed to be surprised with how a genuine snap-on spanner caused slightly concussed people to marvel at the workmanship thus enabling him to carry out his fiendish plan.no cheap chinese rip off tools for a man with his wealth.