Questions you can't answer

Collapse
X
 
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
  • jasbo7
    V.I.P. Member
    • Nov 2008
    • 1432

    #1

    Questions you can't answer

    Questions You Can't Answer

    Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

    Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

    Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

    Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours?

    Are there specially reserved parking spaces for 'normal' people at the Special Olympics?

    If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

    How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

    Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

    Did you ever stop and wonder....... Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?'

    Who was the first person to say, 'See that chicken there.... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its bum.'

    Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

    Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

    Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

    Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs

    If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

    Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

    Stop singing and read on.........

    Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

    Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

    Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?


  • ruudvandan
    DK Veteran
    • Dec 2008
    • 1091

    #2
    Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? cos he's only 12

    Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat? we don't we take em out and rub em

    Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets? cos the Japanese are very through on health and safety

    Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up every two hours? cos the got to suck on tits

    Are there specially reserved parking spaces for 'normal' people at the Special Olympics? At least Boris Johnsons got somewher to park

    If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be? 136.5K

    How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage? cos it makes the yanks think they got bigger penises

    Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? americans again

    Did you ever stop and wonder....... Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?' Tom Green, probably

    Who was the first person to say, 'See that chicken there.... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its bum.' Tom Green again. Are people watchin his show yet?

    Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? who puts toast in a toaster?

    Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? because the gnome who swtiches it on whenever you open the door would freeze to death in the freezer

    Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is? cos they don't want to bring attention to how big their bum is

    Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway? so they can switch their secret video camera on

    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs
    Goofys teeth hold him up

    If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? testing

    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from? mineral oil

    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? who gives a shit? let's just get it on!

    Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? cos gary glitter wrote them

    Stop singing and read on.........

    Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup? I'm not illiterate. My mumm an dad got married 2 weeks before i was born

    Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window? no

    Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster? yes, it makes everyone else waiting for it disappear
    http://www.facebook.com/BoycottFIFASponsors

    Comment

    • jasbo7
      V.I.P. Member
      • Nov 2008
      • 1432

      #3
      knew somebody would have all the answers

      Comment

      Working...