ask thered

[thered]

dear red,

Im afraid that i am breaking the law. I have a tv box and it seems to get all the premium channels. the thing is, i dont have a cable service...


and im a paedophile

am i breaking the law?

yes you are you should never get free cable throw your box in the bin at once

[gmb45]

but thered

thanks for the advice but

[shady77]

thanks aunty red! thats just what i needed to hear!

[thered]

Dear thered,
My gf say she wants to do a 6 t 9, I find these long working hours what should I tell her without hurting her feelings?

tell her that you are allergic to fish but if she really wants to give you a gobble that you wont stand in her way

[thered]

dear red
im worried about my new girl friend , she told me she could suck a golfball through a hosepipe, will i end up losing my tackle
please help

you cant lose what you havent got,but tell her to be careful as if she sucks on too many golf balls she make choke and die ask her to try gobstoppers instead

[thered]

~~~~ me i thought this thread would run and run i must have solved the worlds problems in one night

btw if you feel shy with your problems ie you cant get erect or you have a maggot for a dick ect please pm me and we will chat

my word is my bond i will not tell the forum

[gmb45]

gash to big

dear thered the wifes gash is a bucket i have a 12 inch dick and still cant touch the sides any suggestions

[shady77]

dear thered,
voices in my head tell me to kill whores.
thing is, there are no whores in tamworth, please give me names and addresses of any you might know

[thered]

dear thered the wifes gash is a bucket i have a 12 inch dick and still cant touch the sides any suggestions

you need two items to succeed in this department 1 is gaffa tape the other is a giant dildo my wifes dildo is called big ben

1st of all you need to get an erection put shady v's bardot on from the dk vid section

2nd you need to hold big ben against your throbbing k nob and then surround it in gaffa tape

this will give you the extra girth needed to fill your wife's abyss

[thered]

dear thered,
voices in my head tell me to kill whores.
thing is, there are no whores in tamworth, please give me names and addresses of any you might know

all women are whores young man there are no exceptions some may just go about it in a not so blatant way

they all want looking after they all want your money they all want your 1/2oz of coke

just because you may have no redlight district does not mean you have no whores look a little closer you will see many


failing that there still may be a few left in ipswich that havent been clobbered yet

[shady77]

Thankyou thankyou thankyou.
You have mad it clear that my wife is indeed a whore and i shall be hitting her with a clawhammer this very night.
you have solved my problem, alas i doubt evn you will be able to solve the problem SHE will soon have!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA

[thered]

well done to you sir a clawhammer is good excellent choice im just happy to help

[BobbyX]

dear thered,
blood is spurting from my hoo hoo hole as i type. i'm not a lady! how is this even possible?!?
i await your answer, o great sage.

[BobbyX]

well done to you sir a clawhammer is good excellent choice im just happy to help

can i also suggest swinging a fan heater at her?

[Bulld0g]

Only just found this thread. Class Near as good as Bobbyx's poems. I know where to come to now when i need someone to talk to