Underpants.

[Mr Pumpy]

A quick question here.

Do you wear clean trollies every day, or do you like me have a smell at em at night to see if yer can get another day out of em???

[krazylegz]

Pants or no pants this would not of helped me.

Friday night, loads of beer and a curry, next day got to take bride to work, get in car start driving and then have a fag, get to her work but on way back the fag kicks the digestive system in, not a problem just squeeze them ass cheeks together I thought, on the home straight now, total butt clenching but manage to get car on drive, the buckle of the belt is getting undone, got the house door open, and then................. SHIT maself...... no way.......... no stopping it as a walk to the toilet so a just carry on doing it as a walk, total mudding ma pants, av now got the cheek to sit on the bog and finish off wots left in ma bowels, at this point a think, get yer shitty breeks off, so a undress while am still sitting on the bog, at this point there is shite everyware, all over me and there is shit prints in the floor leading to the shower, am now in shower and trying to wash the stench off me, thats a hard job believe me, got maself dried and now the shit prints over the bathroom floor need to be cleaned so a use the towel that a dried maself with, job done you would never no, shitty denims in washing machine and floor clean but, a left the shitty towel in the bathroom and the next day the missus used it when she had a shower, well she had one shitty face and a was in the shit house, again.

JoK

ha ha thats ~~~~ing class..............thought it would fit nicely into this thread so i copied it http://www.digital-kaos.co.uk/forums...ve-done-30914/

[melloned]

When you gotta go , you gotta go !
When i was mid 20's , newly wed and the factory cat , (i used to live in there !) .
I worked permanent nights ,and set off on my 30min drive , having had the mega sh*ts all day ( and worstening!) , my missus told me not to go.
I thought i'd last the journey , but on a major motorway sliproad at the 5.00pm rush hour , it was a matter of sh*t your pants , or drop e'm !.
I dove out of the car on the slip road hard shoulder and as i sh*t like a budgie , a 50 seater coach full of schoolgirls
drove past , eye's agog !
Proved to me the earth doesn't swallow you up !

[Mr Pumpy]

sh*t like a budgie !

That made me laugh.

[melloned]

Made me blush a bit Mr P !!!!!