During a rant I did a little research into offensive words for 'Retarded people'. Couldn't find a proper list anywhere (limited to 5 mins of searching).
Loads of 'PC' shit about how offensive certain long established words are to retards, but no list of corkers like 'corn flake dribbler'.
Then I found this page, it put a smile on my face. This is nothing more than a pipe dream, but a funny way of looking at it...
Loads of 'PC' shit about how offensive certain long established words are to retards, but no list of corkers like 'corn flake dribbler'.
Then I found this page, it put a smile on my face. This is nothing more than a pipe dream, but a funny way of looking at it...
THE FINAL SOLUTION TO THE RETARD PROBLEM
Arthur's Offensive Genius at its Finest
If you go to any school in America you will find a wing of the school devoted to those with "special needs". Don't be fooled by this psychobabble term... "special needs" is Newspeak for retard. Yeah, yeah I know you know all sorts of kids who are "special" due to some birth defect, drug addled mothers, etc but I honestly don't give a shit. A retard is a retard. That is Viking truth. The most offensive part of the retard wings of schools is the number of staff members. The non-chromosomally challenged deal with limited resources, overworked (not really...but I am targeting retards with this article...not shithead whiny teachers) teachers and incompetent administrations while retards have personal assistants that make sure their helmets are on straight.
Am I the only one who sees the problem here?
Our school districts are spending money like Robert Mugabe while turning out the very kids I call the "wasted generation". We are staring at a generation who has no concept of how to write a sentence and no understanding of who Thomas Jefferson was. The school systems will complain they don't have enough money to properly instruct kids (utter bullshit of course) while spending shit tons of money on retards. I know that some of you have no concept of reality so I challenge you to take a tour of the local school, I personally assure you that you will find that more resources are devoted to the dysgenic retards than the kids who could potentially learn to read and hold a job.
I could go on all day about how stupid school districts are with their spending, in fact I already did that in a recent stroke of genius, but that is not what this article is about. I have a very simple proposal that will allow our community schools to spend more money on the actual human kids while providing an awesome life for rejects at the bottom end of the human bell curve.
Before I lay out the Final Solution to the Retard Problem, I feel like I should define retard. If you don't have 46 chromosomes, you are a retard and not truly human. Not their fault, but a subhuman is a subhuman. If the kid has to take a cocktail of drugs to keep him from killing other kids....he is a retard. Yeah I know, his mom was a meth head. It sucks but the kid will never do anything productive..thus he is a retard. If your kid is 7 years old and can't read...retard. I don't care about the reasons. Realistically 5% of our population at least would fit my definition of retard and that is fine. Shit...bump it up to 25% and we'll solve all of Western Civilization's problems in one fell swoop. Anyone who is clearly unable to compete with the obviously mediocre kids of today is a retard and would be subject to Arthur's Final Solution.
I used the term "Final Solution" because it is offensive and awesome. If you are offended, you are a coward. You are part of the problem. Get the fcuk out of my way and let me fix the issues that plague us. This "Final Solution" does not have anything to do with killing anyone or the Holocaust so you can put away the tube of Vagasil and read on.
Because we know that retards will never positively contribute to society and because we are not man enough to do the "Oh shit...this baby is a retard, off the cliff with him" method, we have to support this group forever. That is already a given, some parents will coddle and support their children but for the most part these genetic failures will be on the dime of society forever. I don't see anyway, short of killing them outright, that we can alleviate that. With the understanding that retards are going to be on societal assistance forever I have devised a solution that minimizes the cost to society AND gives the retards the best life they could ever hope for.
My Final Solution is the construction of "Special Needs Cooperation and Assistance Centers" Newspeak for retard projects. We build 100-200 unit apartment complexes to hold every community's retard population. ONLY retards would live at the assistance centers. They would be admitted into the retard paradise at age 9. No pretending to learn how to read or count. A seven year old retard will just hang out and drool and headbutt shit until they reach the magic age. Their 9th birthday party will be at the retard centers where they will be introduced to the community. Their accommodations would be outfitted with small televisions, microwaves, basic furniture and an array of modern conveniences. The only requirement to live, cost free forever, is to be sterilized. This would not be optional although it would be funny to let retards breed like rabbits and see if we could create the "District 9" level of retard with absurd strength, bird brain and nine arms. The comic relief of seeing a 58 chromosome, eight armed, one eyed retard is almost worth the cost but I am not willing to chance it. So...sterilization it is.
I have some unique insight into retards, I worked with them when I was involved with Special Olympics. One of the unique features of retards is that they will **** anything and everything. We had to keep the "boys" and "girls" separate so they didn't sneak off and **** behind the fence. True ****ing story. This knowledge inspired me to create the "Special Needs Entertainment and Invigoration" part of this plan. I mentioned earlier that all retard rooms get a small television and that was for a reason. In the retard projects there will be one channel that plays all day much like the TV channel of North Korea that shows Kim Jong Il all day. But instead of the daily infusion of Juche greatness, the retards will get nothing but hardcore ~~~~ all day, every day. This will inspire them to be "entertained" all day by ****ing each other senseless. That idea sounded great on paper and then I thought "Oh shit..what if the retards can't get it up after the first three hours of the day" so I decided to infuse the retard water supply with enough Viagra to give it a blue hue. So... these retards can literally be supermen, going around and filling the retard chicks with load after load of retardsauce and never need a break. This should eliminate the question of what the retards will do all day. Genius!
Any real man knows that you can't **** all day on an empty stomach so the next part of my plan is "Special Need Nutritional Convenience". You may have noticed that I mentioned that the retards would have microwaves. Since safety is my main concern, I insist on microwaves because you can provide proper nourishment to the retards without the problems that standard ovens would cause. I can't even imagine the issues a standard oven would cause in rooms loaded with ~~~~-inspired Viagra-enhanced retards. It would be fun to watch but because the welfare of the retard is my primary concern...no ovens.
We know how the retards will cook their food now but what will they eat? Obviously they cannot be trusted to go to the grocery store and will have no currency so food must be provided which I am all too pleased to do. The apartment complexes would be state of the art in that meals would be delivered straight to the rooms via chutes in the walls. So when the retard hit the EAT button the computer system would send his meal straight into the microwave oven. At that point the retard would only have to hit the "HOT POCKET" button on the microwave and in two minutes and fifteen seconds he would have his tasty and nutritious meal ready. No effort, no thought... because who has time for those when your retard cock is hard and there are 50 female retards in the next room watching a 15 man gangbang on their ~~~~ portal tvs. Answer is that you don't have time, you slam that awesome BBQ Beef Hot Pocket and get back to work.
As you can plainly see, I have solved a societal wide problem with a few paragraphs. The retards are no longer in schools wasting money under the guise of "getting them ready for a productive future (that everyone knows won't happen)". The retards get to live in ignorant bliss, happily ****ing other retards while eating as many Hot Pockets as they'd like. Us humans get to live without constantly worrying about offending some mealy mouthed pussy when we speak of retards or downies. Parents with horrible genetics would be lifted of their self-imposed burdensome reject of a child. It is a win, win, win, win situation. This is a "Final Solution" I can get behind. Viva Viagra!
Arthur's Offensive Genius at its Finest
If you go to any school in America you will find a wing of the school devoted to those with "special needs". Don't be fooled by this psychobabble term... "special needs" is Newspeak for retard. Yeah, yeah I know you know all sorts of kids who are "special" due to some birth defect, drug addled mothers, etc but I honestly don't give a shit. A retard is a retard. That is Viking truth. The most offensive part of the retard wings of schools is the number of staff members. The non-chromosomally challenged deal with limited resources, overworked (not really...but I am targeting retards with this article...not shithead whiny teachers) teachers and incompetent administrations while retards have personal assistants that make sure their helmets are on straight.Am I the only one who sees the problem here?
Our school districts are spending money like Robert Mugabe while turning out the very kids I call the "wasted generation". We are staring at a generation who has no concept of how to write a sentence and no understanding of who Thomas Jefferson was. The school systems will complain they don't have enough money to properly instruct kids (utter bullshit of course) while spending shit tons of money on retards. I know that some of you have no concept of reality so I challenge you to take a tour of the local school, I personally assure you that you will find that more resources are devoted to the dysgenic retards than the kids who could potentially learn to read and hold a job.
I could go on all day about how stupid school districts are with their spending, in fact I already did that in a recent stroke of genius, but that is not what this article is about. I have a very simple proposal that will allow our community schools to spend more money on the actual human kids while providing an awesome life for rejects at the bottom end of the human bell curve.
Before I lay out the Final Solution to the Retard Problem, I feel like I should define retard. If you don't have 46 chromosomes, you are a retard and not truly human. Not their fault, but a subhuman is a subhuman. If the kid has to take a cocktail of drugs to keep him from killing other kids....he is a retard. Yeah I know, his mom was a meth head. It sucks but the kid will never do anything productive..thus he is a retard. If your kid is 7 years old and can't read...retard. I don't care about the reasons. Realistically 5% of our population at least would fit my definition of retard and that is fine. Shit...bump it up to 25% and we'll solve all of Western Civilization's problems in one fell swoop. Anyone who is clearly unable to compete with the obviously mediocre kids of today is a retard and would be subject to Arthur's Final Solution.
I used the term "Final Solution" because it is offensive and awesome. If you are offended, you are a coward. You are part of the problem. Get the fcuk out of my way and let me fix the issues that plague us. This "Final Solution" does not have anything to do with killing anyone or the Holocaust so you can put away the tube of Vagasil and read on.
Because we know that retards will never positively contribute to society and because we are not man enough to do the "Oh shit...this baby is a retard, off the cliff with him" method, we have to support this group forever. That is already a given, some parents will coddle and support their children but for the most part these genetic failures will be on the dime of society forever. I don't see anyway, short of killing them outright, that we can alleviate that. With the understanding that retards are going to be on societal assistance forever I have devised a solution that minimizes the cost to society AND gives the retards the best life they could ever hope for.
My Final Solution is the construction of "Special Needs Cooperation and Assistance Centers" Newspeak for retard projects. We build 100-200 unit apartment complexes to hold every community's retard population. ONLY retards would live at the assistance centers. They would be admitted into the retard paradise at age 9. No pretending to learn how to read or count. A seven year old retard will just hang out and drool and headbutt shit until they reach the magic age. Their 9th birthday party will be at the retard centers where they will be introduced to the community. Their accommodations would be outfitted with small televisions, microwaves, basic furniture and an array of modern conveniences. The only requirement to live, cost free forever, is to be sterilized. This would not be optional although it would be funny to let retards breed like rabbits and see if we could create the "District 9" level of retard with absurd strength, bird brain and nine arms. The comic relief of seeing a 58 chromosome, eight armed, one eyed retard is almost worth the cost but I am not willing to chance it. So...sterilization it is.
I have some unique insight into retards, I worked with them when I was involved with Special Olympics. One of the unique features of retards is that they will **** anything and everything. We had to keep the "boys" and "girls" separate so they didn't sneak off and **** behind the fence. True ****ing story. This knowledge inspired me to create the "Special Needs Entertainment and Invigoration" part of this plan. I mentioned earlier that all retard rooms get a small television and that was for a reason. In the retard projects there will be one channel that plays all day much like the TV channel of North Korea that shows Kim Jong Il all day. But instead of the daily infusion of Juche greatness, the retards will get nothing but hardcore ~~~~ all day, every day. This will inspire them to be "entertained" all day by ****ing each other senseless. That idea sounded great on paper and then I thought "Oh shit..what if the retards can't get it up after the first three hours of the day" so I decided to infuse the retard water supply with enough Viagra to give it a blue hue. So... these retards can literally be supermen, going around and filling the retard chicks with load after load of retardsauce and never need a break. This should eliminate the question of what the retards will do all day. Genius!
Any real man knows that you can't **** all day on an empty stomach so the next part of my plan is "Special Need Nutritional Convenience". You may have noticed that I mentioned that the retards would have microwaves. Since safety is my main concern, I insist on microwaves because you can provide proper nourishment to the retards without the problems that standard ovens would cause. I can't even imagine the issues a standard oven would cause in rooms loaded with ~~~~-inspired Viagra-enhanced retards. It would be fun to watch but because the welfare of the retard is my primary concern...no ovens.
We know how the retards will cook their food now but what will they eat? Obviously they cannot be trusted to go to the grocery store and will have no currency so food must be provided which I am all too pleased to do. The apartment complexes would be state of the art in that meals would be delivered straight to the rooms via chutes in the walls. So when the retard hit the EAT button the computer system would send his meal straight into the microwave oven. At that point the retard would only have to hit the "HOT POCKET" button on the microwave and in two minutes and fifteen seconds he would have his tasty and nutritious meal ready. No effort, no thought... because who has time for those when your retard cock is hard and there are 50 female retards in the next room watching a 15 man gangbang on their ~~~~ portal tvs. Answer is that you don't have time, you slam that awesome BBQ Beef Hot Pocket and get back to work.
As you can plainly see, I have solved a societal wide problem with a few paragraphs. The retards are no longer in schools wasting money under the guise of "getting them ready for a productive future (that everyone knows won't happen)". The retards get to live in ignorant bliss, happily ****ing other retards while eating as many Hot Pockets as they'd like. Us humans get to live without constantly worrying about offending some mealy mouthed pussy when we speak of retards or downies. Parents with horrible genetics would be lifted of their self-imposed burdensome reject of a child. It is a win, win, win, win situation. This is a "Final Solution" I can get behind. Viva Viagra!
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