The WAG thread.

[abdul razaq]

Me and my wife were never closer than during our kidnap ordeal.

They tied us back to back with a rope.

[abdul razaq]

I was listening to the local radio earlier when I heard that there was a motorist driving the wrong way down the M1. My wife usually takes M1 from work, so I called to warn her.

"Just giving you a heads up love, there's an idiot driving the wrong way"

"It's not just one, they all are!"

[abdul razaq]

There is one major difference between my wife and my boss. Despite his nagging, my boss pays me.

[abdul razaq]

I'm taking my wife to see Titanic later.

Or 'mum' as she calls her

[abdul razaq]

My mate and his wife met on match.com

It's really weird because they were already married at the time.

[abdul razaq]

If I had a pound for every time I thought about my wife,

I'd probably start thinking about her.

[abdul razaq]

My wife is leaving me next week. I've been preparing myself by compiling play lists on iTunes to see me through the weeks to come. It took me ages to think of names for the three lists I put together. But I settled on Party Mix I, II and III.

[abdul razaq]

I walked into the pub and the barman said, "Your wife is looking very nice this evening. Now what can I get you?"

"Whatever you've been drinking, mate."

[abdul razaq]

As I walked into the kitchen, I saw my wife. I said, "Good morning."

"Aww Abdul, you don't usually wake up with a good attitude," she smiled.

"Get lost you fat cow!" I snapped, and proceeded to make some tea.

[abdul razaq]

My wife threatened to leave me because of my addiction to Football Manager.

So I fined her two week's wages and put her on the transfer list.

[abdul razaq]

How do you turn a normal family saloon car into an off road vehicle?

Let your wife drive it.

[abdul razaq]

My wife was complaining she had an head cold today so I said, "It's probably caused by you being a fat."

"How can being overweight cause a cold?" She replied.

"Well you've always got your head in the fridge."