A guy takes his girlfriend home to meet his parents but tells her "I warn you that they're both deaf & dumb". They get there and walk into the living room, his mum has got a beer bottle up her fanny, and the dad is sitting there with his nuts out and a match stick propping his eye open. His girlfriend says "What the fcuk's this??" He replies "Oh. It's sign language, my mum's saying get the beer in you c*nt" and my dad's saying "bollocks, I'm watching the match"
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